This was going to be a reply to one person but I have written it for the purpose that others may read it as well. It is regarding our kids at church and the challenges they do and will present.
First, I come from the same (slightly younger or older) generation that most at church come from. I feel like I grew up seeming to understand respect very early on. I understand the angst of the disrespect of this current generation as a whole, but every generation has had its pocket of people that have been disrespectful and pushed the boundaries of what was right or acceptable. My advice on this current generation is to not take their actions or disrespect personally. Most of the time they are equal opportunity providers of all that stuff.
I try to see the tough kids (tough to love, tough to connect with, etc) as a challenge that I am determined to win. They provide me an opportunity to enhance my skills as a parent, as an adult, as a Christian and as a representative of the love of the Father given through Jesus and His Holy Spirit. Got a kid who is tough to love? Great! Now we have a reason to get real when we pray. We have a reason to engage that kid in conversations that might reveal their heart, their struggle or their reason for their walls. We also have an opportunity to be genuine in showing the love of Christ to them. We can't do that solely with words, nor can we portray that love through a set of rules that lack any attempt on our parts to connect with them.
In addition to all that, we have the opportunity to check ourselves. How is our heart and our mind? Are we running low on the love of God for all? Are we acting in obedience to the Father when these challenges come up or are we reacting?
Kids will know who is real, who is trying to work them from some angle and they will respond accordingly. So, let's ask ourselves, "Why are we trying or wanting to connect with these kids?" Is it because we have a sense of duty and therefore we must? Do we see these kids through the eyes of the Father and the sacrifice of His Son? How much grace and mercy is too much to give them?
We have to love them through the excess of God's love for us. We will get annoyed, bitter, angry, frustrated and so on if we are only "trying to love them from our own supply".
We, the Church, are not a gift that has been given to the kids. On the contrary, these kids are a gift we have been given. When we get invited into their world, to hear their stories and help them walk through their hard days...that is an honor. When a kid lets his or her guard down and decides that they are going to accept our love and also even love us in return....Wow.
If we want respect then we have to show love...radical love that does not have a Use By date and is not based on performance.
Now, regarding discipline...yes, the kids need to be accountable for their actions. The accountability is not my concern. It is the application of it...the spirit that it is administered in. Let's take the phone incident for example. My biggest concern is the aftermath. Is this kid going to forever be watched like a hawk, whispered about as he passes by and made to feel ostracized because of his offense?
Is the church now on lockdown? Will we become preoccupied with policing the kids versus other things we could be (or were) doing? How much of a distraction will the enemy get to make because of all this?
Last Wednesday in our youth class we talked about the equation of God. The scripture tells us many things, two of which are: love never fails and God is love. therefore if those two are true then it is correct to believe that God never fails. We talked about going into 2018 with the #LoveNeverFails challenge.
We are still defining what that will look like. We are going to challenge the word of God in regards to 1 Corinthians 13:8 and also what Colossians has to say in chapter 3:12-14
"Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection."
"Above all these things"...
tender mercies
kindness
humility
meekness
longsuffering
bearing with one another
forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do
"put on love"
We have a great opportunity to really get on our faces before God about our kids and our entire church. We don't have to respond like the world or even like other churches. We do need to be obedient to the Lord. I honestly believe we are getting ready to be used by the Lord mightily because we are willing to seek Him and know Him and do His will.
The world is currently going out of its way to be offended by everything nowadays. Let's not be so quick to be offended when these challenges come. Let's welcome the opportunity for growth and love .
I love you all.
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